365 Days of Fun in Marriage

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"Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry"

June30

Tip # 61 

 

Really?

Oh my, if  only love did mean “never having to say you’re sorry” were true!

Though I loved the movie Love Story starring Ryan O’Neal and Ali MacGraw in which this line of dialog was from, it’s just not true. People hear the line “Love means never having to say you’re sorry” and think there’s something wrong with them because too often they do hurt their spouses.

Life isn’t perfect and unfortunately, we’re not perfect. We will always bumble or say something that just comes out wrong—or sometimes we say something intentionally when we’re angry—but then regret it.

It would be a Utopian dream to be so perfect to never need to say we’re sorry because our love removes all fallacies. It doesn’t. Plus, personal communication is not an exact science for which you can put everything in its exact place and voilla, your foot never approaches your mouth again.

Never hesitate to offer an apology if it’s sincere. You hurt your spouse so be ready to admit it.  

If you are a Choleric Personality be aware that apologies might be harder for you. A Choleric will often apologize by saying: “I’m sorry you were hurt.” No, that is not the same meaning. Cholerics need to admit when they’ve hurt their spouse whether intentional or not.

Cholerics literally have such a tendency to actually be right so much of the time (seems most of them evaluate things well), that they might not notice the need for an apology—be aware of that. If you are a Choleric, you may need to hone your listening skills and read between-the-lines to see if you’ve offended people.

But, your spouse hurt you, too? You’re only responsible for what you can do and say.

 

~ Glenda (gj)   www.WhatWordsDoYouWear.com     and   www.glendaschoonmaker.com

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